Of all the types of bedroom play that might be considered, shall we say, unconventional, BDSM is probably the most well-known. Never mind society's notions, though, because BDSM, or even just using bondage or BDSM toys, isn't something you need to shy away from if you and your partner are interested in trying it. Let's dig into what BDSM is, how to make your sexy new adventure a safe one and which tools of the trade are best for beginners and experts alike.
What Is BDSM?
BDSM is a real swiss army knife of an abbreviation. Under its umbrella, you have bondage & discipline, dominance & submission and sadism & masochism. However, some aspects of BDSM can be explored without the others — it all depends on what you and your partner prefer. In BDSM, there is generally a dominant partner and a submissive partner, but many people find enjoyment in switching roles as well.
How To Have Safe Sex With BDSM
Before we dive into the really fun stuff, there are some tips and ground rules to go over. The first and most important one of all is consent. And that doesn't just go for the initial "yes, I want to try this" — if at any point your partner wants to stop, you have to stop.
BDSM can be a little tricky in this regard. Part of the fun is saying "no" as part of roleplay when, in reality, you're having a great time. That's why safe words are so important. These are words that clearly have nothing to do with the scenario you and your partner have crafted together. It could be a color, like red, or a food, like chocolate. You could even create combo phrases, like red chocolate, to indicate the level of discomfort, ranging anywhere from "not a fan" to "slam the breaks."
And, for beginners, it's best to start small. Lighter, more playful Bondage toys are probably a better jumping off point than full-on hardcore BDSM toys, yes? For example, you could try tying or handcuffing your partner's hands together, or putting a blindfold on them to build suspense while you pepper them with sultry sensations. Just remember to talk with one another through the process: it's important for figuring out boundaries and preferences, but also for setting the mood.
Feeling good? Because next we're breaking down the best BDSM toys by category. But don't worry — you can always mix and match for an experience all your own.
Bondage & Discipline
This subset of BDSM is when a submissive partner is restrained, and even trained, by a dominant partner. Discipline could involve everything from spanking to whipping to erotic humiliation, while bondage could involve simply binding the hands or placing the submissive partner in a cage.
There are lots of light bondage toys that would be great for experimenting. There are even whole bondage kits that give you everything you need for a truly sexy evening. Try out some rope, BDSM handcuffs, a blindfold or even a BDSM leash and collar.
The pros can take it up a notch. Try out a bondage bar to limit the submissive partner's movement, a bondage swing for some sexy acrobatics and plenty of outfits and accessories to get the blood pumping. From nipple clamps to harnesses to crotchless panties, the possibilities for both doms and subs are endless.
Speaking of…
Dominant & Submissive
These titles speak for themselves. This power dynamic is central to BDSM, and it's a major draw for most people who want to try it — or who incorporate it regularly in their bedroom routine.
You can use the same bondage toys we listed above, or if you're ready to take the plunge, add some of the more extreme BDSM toys into the mix. Like what, you may ask? How about the Door Swing, which allows you to strap in your partner without fear of damaging your door or ceiling.
Sadism & Masochism
While this part of BDSM relies on the dom/sub dynamic, it's more about giving and receiving erotic pain than simply being in control. The sadist gains pleasure from inflicting pain while the masochist draws pleasure from the pain inflicted on them. The pain can be derived from spanking, whipping, scratching, pinching and pretty much anything else your mind can conjure up.
BDSM toys for sadism and masochism are some of the most varied, giving you endless room for creativity. Use bondage whips and crops for quick snaps on the rear or cock and ball cages to make sure he doesn't get up to anything naughty without your say-so. Vibrating nipple clamps can also cause as much pleasure as they do pain. Like we said: wherever your imagination goes, the toys (and your sub) are sure to follow. On that note, may we suggest a leash?
Gear Up & Get Frisky With PinkCherry
When it comes to BDSM, you don't just want any old bondage toys for you and your play partner. You want the best BDSM toys around — and you can find them right here at PinkCherry. Beginners and experts can both find the perfect bondage kits, outfits and accessories to make any night magically masochistic (if that's your schtick). Get started today.
