So, you and your partner have decided to delve into the exciting world of BDSM and try out some BDSM gear. You haven’t settled on what kinds of punishments or roleplaying you both feel comfortable with, but you don’t necessarily want to spend hours researching. Maybe you saw a steamy video or read an erotic book, and brat BDSM has piqued your curiousity.
What is brat BDSM? Is it similar to primal BDSM or a BDSM rigger? Nope, not quite. Everyone knows that a brat isn’t someone most people want to spend time with, so how does that factor into BDSM? Not to worry! PinkCherry breaks it all down in this article
We’ve got everything you have ever wanted to know about being a brat in the bedroom, how to do it right, and how to respond to a bratty partner. Don’t waste your time Googling “brat BDSM meaning” or “why do people like BDSM?” when we can sum it up and you could be getting naughty with your partner!
What Does It Mean to be a Brat?
Unlike in real life when being a brat translates to rudeness or an un-cooperative nature, being a brat in the context of BDSM is another way to be a submissive for your dominant. It isn’t a personality flaw; it’s a role you choose to take on in the bedroom.
Being a brat in BDSM means that you tease or are otherwise rude to your dominant. While many submissives choose a docile personality and are eager to please, brats are the opposite. Brats might snark at their dom, call them names, or resist their commands. If the scene involves tying the submissive down, a brat might try to get away or not hold still for long enough. Practicing some bratty behavior is an easy way to test out your interest in BDSM.
Depending on which toys are in play, brats might alter their behavior by tugging at their restraints or complaining that the dom isn’t doing something correctly. If one of the ropes is loose or they can safely extricate themselves, a brat might do that or just squirm and refuse to listen to their master.
It can seem annoying if you don’t talk things out with your partner beforehand or if you insult them too much. At the end of the day, though, a brat does want to be eventually dominated or ‘tamed’ by their master. This is important to remember as a person involved in bratty behavior and brat play.
Understanding the Role of a Brat Tamer
Essentially, a brat wants to be punished in direct response to what they have done. That means that a brat will seek to break rules or push their dom to their limits in order to earn a harsher punishment. Generally, these punishments are sexual in nature and cater to their fantasy of being sexily punished for talking back.
Bratty submissives are still submissive at heart. So, no matter how much backtalking sass they might give out, they aren’t going to resist a strong dom taking them to task. In fact, they truly enjoy it!
So, as a brat tamer, your job is to show your dominance. For some couples, that might mean a show of physical strength. When you order your brat to crawl towards you and they refuse - saying something like “Make me!” - you can flex those muscles and pull them down on the bed.
It doesn’t always have to be about “might making right” though. Maybe you just have to be intimidating, stern, or bribe your brat by being especially enticing and make them feel like they’re missing out on something great by ignoring you. Outthinking your sub is another way to ‘make them’ do what you want.
As the dom, your job is to figure out how to take care of your submissive. If you have a bratty submissive then you’ll have to try and come up with the best way to combat their behavior.
How to Act Out as a Brat in BDSM
We discussed how to be a traditionally pleasing submissive in a previous article, but brats have a unique take on being a sub. There are plenty of different ways to act out as a brat in BDSM depending on what you and your partner have discussed beforehand.
Good Old-Fashioned Sass
The best way to be a brat is to sass your dominant. Things like “why don’t you make me?” or “I could have a better orgasm in my sleep!” sound cliché, but dirty talk usually does until it’s said in the heat of the moment.
Who Gives the Orders Around Here?
Try giving your dom a few orders or deliberately disobeying some to get a rise out of them. They might playfully let their tempers get the best of them and give you the kind of punishment you’re sure to remember for days!
Brat BDSM Tips
When it comes to being a brat in a BDSM scene, it’s crucial to know both how to act out and how to reel it in. We’ve got a couple of critical tips to keep in mind if you’re feeling like some sass could be the hot spice you need.
Talk it Out
Of course, the best tip for any kind of BDSM is communication, communication, communication! Before you try something new in the bedroom, you absolutely need to have a conversation with your partner about it. The amount of detail you go into for planning purposes varies based on what you like and what is feasible, but you should always give your partner a heads-up if you plan to add a little disobedience into the scene.
One of the reasons this is important is to establish safe words and boundaries. If your partner has just started learning to tie knots and needs to maintain full concentration while they work with ropes, you might decide to put a lid on the bratty behavior while they are tying and then get mouthy again once they’re done.
Alternatively, there might be certain sore subjects that your partner doesn’t have much confidence in. Using the same example, you might not want to sass them by saying that their knots suck or they’re bad at tying you down since they’re still learning. It’s essential to know how far you can push without breaking the mood. Anger in the bedroom? Not sexy.
But Keep Some Secrets
Just because you want to ensure that you and your partner are on the same page doesn’t mean you have to tell them everything. If you have some kinky ideas for how to get their attention like refusing to obey certain orders or purposefully doing things with snide retorts, don’t give it all away. Even as a submissive brat, it can be fun to mess with the dominant person!
Part of what makes the brat/brat tamer relationship fun is how unexpected some of the sass is. If you pick and choose your moments to back-talk your partner, they’ll never know when to expect the unexpected. Just make sure they can tell the difference between you sassing them and when you make a valid complaint about the sex.
Let’s Sum It Up
If you’re looking for a great way to keep your bratty submissive in line, try using some of our great bondage gear to tie them down and have your way! PinkCherry has everything you need to explore some of the kinkier aspects of BDSM, so what are you waiting for? Get out there and be a brat…you have our permission!
Sources
https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a31206912/brat-bdsm-meaning/
https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a35097569/brat-bdsm/
https://www.brazenguide.com/explore/everything-you-need-to-know-about-being-a-submissive-brat/
