For people who want to bring a bit of erotic adventure into the bedroom, strap-ons are a fun, simple way to do that. But, what is a strap-on exactly? A strap-on is a device that usually attaches to your pelvis and holds a dildo where a penis would be on your body. The best part is that anyone can use them for a little harness play! Regardless of you or your partner’s gender or sexuality, a strap-on can be fun for everyone looking to make their sex life a little more enticing without a ton of work or money required!
For people who want to bring a bit of erotic adventure into the bedroom, strap-ons are a fun, simple way to do that. But, what is a strap-on exactly? A strap-on is a device that usually attaches to your pelvis and holds a dildo where a penis would be on your body. The best part is that anyone can use them for a little harness play! Regardless of you or your partner’s gender or sexuality, a strap-on can be fun for everyone looking to make their sex life a little more enticing without a ton of work or money required!
How to Put on A Strap-On
Let the fun begin! There are two parts to a strap on dildo: the harness and the dildo. A harness is the strap part, and it usually sits around the wearer’s your hips. Most harnesses look like boxer briefs or panties (the underwear look) or like multiple straps, depending on your body shape and style preferences. It’s essential to make sure that your dildo and harness are compatible because the dildo fits through an O-shaped opening, so compatibility is definitely something you want to check.
Ready for a wild ride? The following steps take you through the process of putting the strap-on on. Just remember that these are basic steps that assume you bought a standard harness with an O-ring and metal snaps to hold the dildo in place. So, grab your best strap-on dildo, and away we go!
1. Take the O-ring out of the harness. Some harnesses come with interchangeable rings to accommodate different dildo sizes, but most have a single ring.
2. Put on your harness the same way you would step into your boxers or panties.
3. Use the metal snaps to reattach the O-ring so that the dildo is firmly held in the harness and doesn’t come out, even if things get a little rough and steamy.
4. Put on your harness the same way you would step into your boxers or panties.
5. You want the harness to fit snugly around your hip bones, so take a second to adjust it.
6. If your harness includes thigh straps, now is the time to adjust them as well.
7. Lubricate! We cannot stress the importance of lube enough, especially during harness play!
8. Hold the dildo as you initially penetrate your partner. Go slow! Slow and steady allows both of you to get used to the feeling and experiment with sex position.
9. You won’t need your hands once you have inserted it. The main thing to remember is that you will have to watch the dildo because if it slips out, you may not notice right away since you can’t physically feel it.
Now, are you ready to be mind blown? When learning the different ways for how to use a strap on, it's important to remember that a harness doesn’t have to go around your pelvis. You can find harnesses that fit around your head, feet, chin, legs, or hands. You can follow these necessary steps with any kind of strap-on and just correct for the body part the dildo is attaching to. See, the possibilities really are endless in the strap-on department!
If you are worried about getting overwhelmed with too many complicated steps and want to start with a beginner’s strap-on system, those also exist. Vac-U-Loc makes simple harnesses that are perfect for people who are new to this and are starting to learn how to use a strap on.
How to Use A Strap-On Correctly
There is no wrong way to use a strap-on! As long as everyone is consenting and having fun, it is a very versatile, erotic sex toy that can help you achieve just about any fantasy. For women, strap-ons are often designed to firmly press against the clitoris as they thrust, which allows them to orgasm by moving. But they can be just as rewarding for people with any genitalia.
The main thing to remember, once you have assembled the strap-on, successfully put it on, and secured it to your body, is to use plenty of lube. In our opinion, you can never use too much lube! Regardless of where you are planning to put the dildo, lube is essential for optimal stimulation. Even places like the vagina and mouth that self-lubricate can benefit from a little extra slick. It keeps everything nice and smooth and ensures your erotic playdate won’t end in injury!
Typically, a vagina will only produce lubrication for about 30 minutes of penetration, so if you are planning a long night of pleasure, you will definitely need some help. Keep in mind that if you are generally used to using silicone lubricant, you shouldn’t use that with a silicone dildo. The silicone on silicone will degrade your sex toy and shorten its lifespan, no matter how well you wash it afterward.
Communication is key when using a strap-on for partnered play. If penetration isn't your or your partner's preferred method of pleasure, you'll be happy to know there are a variety of toys for women and men that you could incorporate into your strap-on play. If however, strap-on play is right up your alley, we've got some tips to make sure your playtime is a great time.
5 Tips for Maximum Pleasure:
It’s GO time! Now that your strap-on is fully assembled and ready to go, the hard part is over. Take a second to congratulate yourself and test out your newfound phallus. Then once you’re raring to go, we have some “oh-so-satisfying” tips to help you and your partner reach new heights of stimulation and ecstasy.
1. Choose Your Dildo Wisely
There’s no one-size-fits-all here! You can choose between substantial dildos, vibrators, and dildos that have a second penetrating limb to hold in yourself while you thrust. If you have a vibrator or penetrating dildo, try masturbating with it a few times before using it with your partner. It will help you get used to the feeling and know whether that dildo is the right one for you.
2. Put A Ring on It
For people who want some good vibrations, it can be daunting to find a vibrator that both fits into your harness ring and doesn’t cost you an arm and a leg. Want a quick lifehack? Use a vibrating cock ring. You can secure it around the dildo after attaching the dildo to the harness, so you won’t have to worry about something not being compatible, and it won’t cost nearly as much as a full vibrator.
The vibrations might not be as strong, but you shouldn’t underestimate the power of a simple cock ring. Alternatively, if you want the pulse but your partner isn’t as crazy about the idea, many underwear model strap-ons include a small pocket in the front where you can slip in a bullet vibrator because self-care is vital. So, do what feels best to you!
3. Dominate with Care
Oh, the fun of doms and subs! Plenty of people like to incorporate dominance and submission into their sex lives, and strap-ons are an easy and exciting way for a woman to dominate a man through pegging, or anal play. If power and authority are part of your sexual equation, there is a lot to be said for how a strap-on allows you to take control of the situation. You’ll feel sexually empowered when moving from one sex position to the next.
So, how does this work? You get to set the pace and decide when things happen and how quickly. That control can be a heady feeling for some people, and knowing that your partner can’t climax without your say-so is something many people find very sexy indeed.
4. Practice Makes Perfect
Three cheers for practice! For most people, knowing how to wear a strap-on dildo harness comes with a small adjustment period. It might feel embarrassing or awkward to practice with your partner initially (which is completely normal), but everyone must learn what they like. Putting on the harness and attaching the dildo is also something that requires a bit of manual dexterity and patience, and you probably don’t want to have the instruction manual front and center when your partner is ready to make you moan. Practice will ensure that you’re ready to roll when the mood strikes!
Most of all, be patient. Like anything else in the bedroom, it may take some time to figure what feels right and what doesn’t really suit you. If it isn’t working for you in the heat of the moment, go back to what does, and then return to the harness idea another night when you both are ready to be a little more patient. Communicate frequently with your partner and be willing to try out different strap-on positions, harnesses, and dildos. As long as both of you are enjoying yourselves, you can’t go wrong.
5. Find What Works for You
Everyone is different! Larger people may experience some trouble using a strap-on with the phallus directly over their pubic bone. If you find that thrusting is difficult with the dildo in that position, try putting it on the largest part of your stomach. Ideally, you should put the dildo halfway between your pubis and your belly button. That way, rolling your hips will still move the dildo, but you can maintain more control. Again, do what feels and works best for you! This is indeed your sex life, after all.
In Summary
Bring on the sensual strap-on fun! If you and your partner have been waiting to try out a strap-on because it seems intimidating or you have been worried about not knowing how to use it a dildo harness properly, don’t let fear or worry get in the way! Now that you know all about putting together a strap-on and how to make the most of your evening, get out there and spice things up in the bedroom with a brand spanking new strap-on (spanking not included, of course)!
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